I take so many things in my life for granted.
The air I breath, the water I drink, the fact I never have to worry about where my next meal is coming from. You grew up on the Ark a ruthless place filled with stale air and rough people. You didn't get to experience Earth until you were sent here to pretty much die. And since then that's exactly what you've been trying to avoid. You are brave and kind and like Lexa said, a leader to fight for. You helped keep your people alive, even if that meant getting put in harms way, or giving up bits and pieces leaving you a little bloody and a little broken. I'm lucky. I got to have a childhood. I got a chance to be a kid and run around, be crazy, play pretend, not have a care in the world. I might have grown up too fast, but I never had the weight of countless lives on my shoulders.
You know there's a part in a letter where you ask the other person how life is, how they are holding up. I already know the answer to both. You are afraid, anxious, worried about the war. Maybe even thinking about what to do about Lexa. Because underneath it all you're still a teenager, you're still allowed to think about things that may seem small at a time when spears and stuff are being shot at you. Everyone in your life is about to go into war, so i'm guessing they are also scared, and anxious. I can't help but think of what Bellamy said while back, "Who we are, and who we need to be to survive are very different things". There was a lot of sacrifice, particularly on your part to get to this point, to be able to win this war. I want to say something really cliche like it'll get better, you'll be stronger for it. And while they may be true I feel like you deserve more than an "it's okay" after what you've been through.
You know there's a part in a letter where you ask the other person how life is, how they are holding up. I already know the answer to both. You are afraid, anxious, worried about the war. Maybe even thinking about what to do about Lexa. Because underneath it all you're still a teenager, you're still allowed to think about things that may seem small at a time when spears and stuff are being shot at you. Everyone in your life is about to go into war, so i'm guessing they are also scared, and anxious. I can't help but think of what Bellamy said while back, "Who we are, and who we need to be to survive are very different things". There was a lot of sacrifice, particularly on your part to get to this point, to be able to win this war. I want to say something really cliche like it'll get better, you'll be stronger for it. And while they may be true I feel like you deserve more than an "it's okay" after what you've been through.
You're one years older than me yet you are so much wiser and stronger than I could ever hope to be. You never asked to be a leader, but perhaps that's what makes you such a good one. You said recently that life should be about more than surviving. Amazing how things like war can put life into perspective. How frail and ephemeral it all is. You've been living in a perpetual state of war, fighting the grounders, fighting to live, and now a new war is here. I hope you find something that makes you happy because at the end of all the craziness, the battles, and the the gory moments of life, you want happiness. So if you find it I say hold on to it.
I wrote this this in math class. I mean who needs Calculus anyways? You would be in school right now. Maybe you'd be in college, trying to become a doctor like your mom. Instead you are making decisions that make you out to be ruthless while trying to save your people. I think you are bad-ass. Strange how in this world we still can't quite stomach equality between men and women, yet in yours there is equality and the chance for strong bad-ass women to be leaders. I guess what i'm trying to say is that you are someone we can look up to, respect.
The world today is crazy. The world you live in is even more so. Yet the battles seem to be similar sometimes. We all fight for love, hope we can find a friend we can rely on 24/7. We look for the happy moments in life. We try to do more than survive, we try to find reasons to live for and then proceed to try and be alive. It's nice to be able to relate to you. It's nice to see someone be so strong and move forward. So keep being a bad-ass.
Love,
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