Okay so I've been thinking a lot lately about being happy and about how hard it is to be happy.Sometimes life is hell bent on being crazy and difficult and scary. It's hard to remember to be happy in the face of it all. Sometimes we get caught up in all the crazy that we forget to smile and just enjoy the moment.

1. Set up time for yourself. I can't stress how important it is to set up time where you can just do nothing or maybe something you've been wanting to do. Whether it's just listening to music, watching your favorite show, doing some yoga, or having a dance party, it's important to give yourself a break. My sister is constantly telling me to practice self care. For me that means deep breathing and relaxation exercises as well as some reading time. You need to out yourself first because this is your life and you deserve to enjoy it. 
2. Let go of what you can't control. I have this really bad habit of wanting to control everything and anything. And that means I get stressed out  a lot. I have to remember that I can't control people, or situations. I need to let go and just breath, For example, right now I can right the best personal statement I can and make sure my application is perfect, after that it's out of my hands. I know it can be crazy scary to let go of the reigns but trust me you'll feel a lot better for it. 
3. Exercise. You don't have to get all fitness guru and try out crazy work outs. You just need to have a couple moments out of your head doing something that release endorphins which in turn make you feel better. You can try Zumba (its really fun) or Kickboxing, or watch some videos online. Walk your dog, go for a run with your dog. Someone once told me that having a dog is like having  a drunk best friend. 
4. Create a reasonable work schedule. Don't try and push yourself to the brink constantly and not expect to fall a couple times. Don't try and pack things in when you know it'll make you stressed out and tired and miserable. You know yourself best, do the things you handle, push yourself, but don't burn yourself out. If you have work due soon, then work on it slowly so you don't have to do it all in one go. Procrastination causes stress which creates a not so happy person. Also you become very sleep deprived this way. I would know. So work on something the minute you know about and slowly get it done. You'll stress less this way. 
5. Stop comparing yourself, your life to others. I saw this quote on tumblr that read "don't compare your beginning to someone else's middle" and it's true. By becoming an envious person upset that life isn't like their idols, or friends your letting your life pass you by. You shouldn't compare yourself to others because everyone has their own thing going on, you need to find your own. Looking around at how someone dresses and how they live life isn't going to help you. You need to do you without trying to look at what the rest of the people in the world are doing. You, my friend, are awesome and beautiful and badass. You got this. You are you and that is more than enough don't try and lessen that by comparing yourself to someone else.
6. Spend time with people you care about. Don't shut yourself to the world. Go out, have fun give yourself a break from all the crazy. Make a coffee date with your best friend, go watch a movie, or better yet have a movie marathon with some junk food. Trust me a few hours of just having fun with people you can vent to or can make you forget about the bad stuff is worth it. 

Blogtober: Dear Future Me,

I'm studying for my Unit 2 Psychology exam tomorrow. I'm so tired I think its quite possible i'll keel over at any point and just start sleeping. Today has pretty much just been about school and the art of being tired yet lucid enough to learn. I've often day dreamed about the future in class. I've dreamt up how my life would look ten years from now and to be quite honest it changes every time. When I was little 26 year old me seemed so old and so distant I couldn't even really imagine myself that age. Now it's still far away but I have this vague sense of what might have happened and how far I am from my goal, my dream, the reason I try in school right now.

I've imagined myself in New York, yet I've also daydreamed myself in L.A, sometimes even in England. By now you probably graduated from university so Congrats!! You are now the third person in our immediate family to go and graduate from college! I bet you Mom cried. And i bet because you saw her cry, you cried, and because you cried various other people cried. And suddenly there were happy tears everywhere! At least that's how I pictured it. You might be frequenting cafe's, relishing in independence, or maybe you're visiting mom every other weekend because you miss the food. Both of which your 16 year old self is okay with. Maybe you're already a published author, Maybe you're still struggling, in which case KEEP TRYING. Dreams don't work if you don't. Happiness is a journey not a destination. Okay i'm done being a Hallmark card for now.

I hope you have a better sense of what you're doing because i'm not really sure what i'm doing with my life half the time. Maybe it's because I need time to see how important High School is or something but sometimes I swear I feel so very lost. I know what I want it's just that getting there is hard and sometimes I lose sight of my end goal and just meander my way down the path. Maybe this being lost thing is just an angsty teen thing. Or maybe it's not. Guess only time will tell. And maybe you already know.

I guess it almost be time for the high school reunion huh? Bet you're feeling old right now. Time to get all nostalgic about high school and the people we know/knew.Its bittersweet knowing that in a couple years the chances of me actually retaining the friendships I have now are slim. Eventually they will be people in pictures, people laughing in my memories. But that will be that. I'm pretty sure you're feeling old right now. I hope I get to find new people. And I hope I still keep some of my old peeps.

So my question to you, future me, is would 16 year old me be happy with you? Are you making me proud? Are you still as cheesy as I am? Reading YA as fervently? Still into indie music? Maybe as you're reading this you're listening to my old high school playlists. Amazing just how much a song can be. It can be part of memories and feelings and action.  I've always wanted to grow up to be a strong, independent, girl with dreams bigger than the moon, yet making them come true. That's who i'm working on being. I think I saw somewhere on tumblr a quote that read "be the person you needed when you were younger". Are you that person?

The big thing, the most important thing, is knowing that i'm happy. That somewhere down the line I find that invigorating happiness that comes from being alive and letting life engulf you. And that, that happiness is around me all the time. Not that i'm not happy now, but it's hard to think happy thoughts when all you can think of is a)how tired you b)how hard your test is and c)will this look good on college apps. In between that it's hard to actually let life just work it's magic and make me feel all warm and fuzzy. I do have happy moments though and they'v been pretty awesome. Their just a little harder to come by. Then again it's junior year. That's just what happens.  I just hope that me working now, and me working 5 years down the line, will work in getting you happy. To the place we both know I want to be in.

Maybe happy means that i'm not where i'd thought i'd be. Maybe it means i'm somewhere random. Maybe it means that i'm working two jobs. Maybe that means i'm not published. Maybe it means I am. What ever it is I hope I'm happy. And if I find someone to be happy with too, that even more awesome.

So go be happy future me. Go be you. Go do whatever it is you do with your day. Or go do some crazy shit! Drink some tea, have some coffee. Maybe do something spontaneous like go visit Alaska!

Hosted by The Daily Tay and Helene in Between

Love Always,